October 19, 2009

It probably went something like this.

I wake at 7:20 and pull on my hoodie. I straighted my faded orange brown bangs. I open my overheating fridge and pour a mug of diet coke. I drink in thirty seconds. I hear the honk of Cookie and dash for the car. Daniel is ten minutes late again but I would have been too if I picked him up. We drive down state at spaceship speed Lady Ga Ga  blaring in our groggy ears.

I run to Art 1010 and Mr. White smiles as I run in late. I sit down and take out my mediocre still life. Half asleep me and Kenna eat her lunch Stacy packed for her. I draw for about ten minutes but  so I am listening to Lauren tell me about some odd fact of the universe and discuss with her the rest of class. Spartan Vision comes on and I watch the PSA's about sluffing and watch Kristina awkwardly but informatively anchor to the student body. The bell rings and I shuffle to A Capella choir.

Choir is a pointless blur. I make fun of people with Brianna and listen to Lindsay and Hayley chat about life. We sing Amazing Grace and I wake from the haze of insecurity and just release it into a song of redemption and hoping for something better than this moment. The endless hour and a half ends and I head to Sport Psychology.

On the way to Sports Psych, I walk past everyone  I will not miss seeing in a year and head to the second floor. There sits Daniel  in the right hand corner with his headphones in. I sit down and I say something  pretty awkward and I get the "Oh my hell you did not just say that look". The bell rings and I turn around and  Demoux teaches us about teamwork. I draw Daniel pictures in my notebook with captions like "Do you enjoy the ride?" "Joe wake up!" He responds with picture of us as Lady Ga Ga for Halloween. The bell rings and we drive to his house for lunch.

I open up the pantry and grab the jar of peanut butter. Daniel pulls out the wheat thins and puts them in bags. I take my green cup out of the pantry and drink some fridge water. We make our sandwiches and head back to Murray.

I go to algebra 2 and sit in the back. I'm the only senior. I hear the sophomores endlessly buzz about MAG and other school functions. The loud Spartanion girl rambles on about her awesome weekend with her awesome friends and awesome drama etc. etc. I plug Lilly my i-pod in and blast some T-Swift because I'm in a sappy mood and venture into the world of Slope and intercept.

Bell rings and I'm in Cookie and we're driving taking pictures for Daniel's art studio class.

This was life. Looking back, this was one of the best times of my life. But at the same time, here, now present I am. I be. I create.

not I tolerate. not I wait. not I can't.

Today, this is I can.